Kazzy and Decchan

1) Stop and think about what you're doing. Perhaps you've fallen in love with the mysterious, sexy ways of your anime husbando. Maybe you came across a picture of a super-kawaii Japanese guy on the internet and got sucked into a vortex from which you neither know how to nor want to escape. Perhaps you love J-Pop. Perhaps you love K-Pop and any guy resembling an East Asian is "close enough" — Stop. If you are specifically targeting Japanese or East Asian guys, you might be approaching or have already crossed the line of objectifying people. I'm not saying it's inherently wrong to want to date a person of a specific ethnicity, but I implore you to think of why that's what you want. Appearance? Personality? You can find traits, appearance or personality, that are attractive to you in a person from anywhere. There are at least hundreds of millions of men available on this space rock. If you meet a guy who is your type, and your only reason for not da...

I'm trying something out: Augmenting a post with my meme arsenal. I don't remember where I got most of the memes, but if I do, I'll say. Just assume that if it's funny, I didn't make it. ~ * ~ Easter Sunday, Kaz came up to Virginia to meet my dad for the first time. It took a turn for the interesting, and I wish I had taken pictures. I've learned my lesson. Kaz wanted to buy some nice liquor for my dad on the way, but couldn't because none of stores were open yet. Tentatively, I snuck out before my dad woke up and hustled to the grocery store to buy some of my favorite alcoholic root beer . Hard root beer? ... Beer? I half expected there to be a prohibition on selling alcohol on Easter (shows you how much I know about buying alcohol,) but I made it back and gave it to Kaz to give to my dad. After greetings and giving him the root beer, we went to brunch at Tarrant's West , where there was a n expensive as hell  lovely and delicious Easter ...

Not really trading, but hey, title pun. I heard about FaceApp this week and tried it out for myself. 右上： 顔で笑って、心で泣いて (Upper right: Smiling on the outside, crying on the inside ) After toying around with my own face, I went for Kaz's. Sexy Grandpa Alert. Then, I got a brilliant idea, and downloaded FaceFilm , a face blending app. Kaz's face + Male version of my face = Female version of Kaz's face + my face without makeup = Female version of Kaz's face + my face with makeup = I went ham from there, changing the sexes of the blended faces, and making them older or younger: Somebody help me. ~Decchan

I just watched a video by Lily Lee , a Korean vlogger with a Kenyan husband and two adorable, smart girls, in which her oldest daughter, Yuri, refuses to play with a Doc McStuffins doll in favor of a Sofia the First princess doll. Yuri goes on to claim she wants "to be yellow, just like Mommy." Lily brings up a very good point, that while there are some dolls that resemble her brown-skinned, curly-haired daughters, none of them are Disney princesses . And that means something. "Disney is like a dream world for little girls. They dream in Disney, and they fantasize in Disney," Lily says, while bemoaning the lack of a curly-haired, brown-skinned Disney princess. I had always believed it important for children to be exposed to dolls of many ethnicities, and especially important for children of color to have access to dolls that resemble themselves. However, until she brought this up, I had never thought of the potential specific importance of black Disney prin...

Have you ever fangirled over your significant other? Because I definitely did yesterday. Kaz and I attended his school's Spring Gala. And can you blame me? He was hecka handsome. Hi. To thank him for the tickets, I bought him a bow tie from Brooks Brothers. It took him an hour to tie it after asking, "It can't be that hard, right?" He did a perfect job, though. Bein' James Bond and ish. I got my hair done by Kyle at MAC (super sweet guy; he had previously given me a free replacement for my makeup pad that came apart, so I requested him for makeup) and my makeup done by Jill at  Taji Salon  (super sweet girl; she took me early and I was done before my appointment time [I shampooed and conditioned earlier that day though, because my appointment time was cutting it close.]) Of course the only clutter in the room finds its way into the picture. Auntie (my aunt I grew up with) had to leave early, and expressed her wish to see Kaz's reac...

I thought it would be cool to share these eight things in honor of eight months together. Someone asked me on YouTube a while ago why Kaz likes me (in a pejorative way,) and later, Nobita asked during my interview for his  Find Your Love In Japan video . I wasn't sure either time, so I asked Kaz. Eight Things Kazzy Likes About Decchan She's intellectually curious about Japan. The interaction with her family. That probably won't happen so early in Japan. She is very permissive {Decchan: I think he means I'm not very controlling of his activities.} She's good at cooking. She's okay with bad, vulgar jokes, which is awesome. We have so many things in common. She is very thoughtful. She is funny and also sometimes girly, which is cute. Eight Things Decchan Likes About Kazzy He pursues his interests and ideas with a hard-working spirit. He's talkative and listens well, so we always have good conversation. He's smart. He likes to cuddle, ho...

When you're dating someone from another country in your home country, it's only natural for it to come across your mind whether the person is not interested in you, but your citizen status. Admittedly, Kaz worried me in the very beginning. Our second date was the day after our first (I was the one who asked him on a second date so quickly.) At the end, while I was wondering if we'd share our first kiss, instead he popped the question, "Will you be my girlfriend?" I said yes before my brain could reboot and I could take a second to think. The next day, I expressed my worries that we were rushing the relationship. He explained that he hopes to get married before 30, and later he further explained that he hopes to work in the U.S. and getting married to an American would give him U.S. work status, and as such, access to better jobs than if he had to find a company to sponsor his work status (many companies don't want to have to go through the extra effort.) I...

Note: All of the screenshot comments in this post were written by black-presenting people. I won't normally do two posts in one weekend, but this is the best time for both. I'm not here to police anyone's responses. I am, however, here to give my opinion. And I was highly irritated by some of the Facebook comments from other black people on this recent video. Quick synopsis if you don't want to watch: The woman pictured made an Airbnb reservation for two people (and I believe two dogs, but it's unclear,) and later asked the host, Tami, if it would be okay for her to add two people. Tami said this was fine, she would just have to pay more. However, when they were nearly there, after driving through crappy weather, Tami suddenly went back on her word, cancelling the reservation, and the two had a message exchange including Tami calling the woman, "insanely high" for thinking she would get such a good deal, "One word says it all. Asian," ...

I'm going to answer a few questions people might have, very generally. If you are interested in more detailed versions of anything here or have other questions, just ask and I will be happy to elaborate. Pics or it ain't happening. Dis us. Where we live: Kaz is in my hometown in North Carolina. I live in Virginia, but I frequently go between Virginia and NC. How long have we been dating? Only seven and a half months. How did we started dating? We met via the Coffee Meets Bagel app. After a week or so of chatting, we went on our first date, and our second date the night after. He asked me out at the end of the second date. Have we met the families? He has celebrated multiple holidays with my family. I plan to go to Japan in June to meet his. How did our families react? My family has always been completely fine with interracial dating. His mom told him to take good care of me, and 'likes' our pictures on Facebook. His father didn't dis...

I was fortunate enough to be included in a Find Your Love In Japan video! For those of you who haven't heard of this channel, it is run by a Japanese guy named Nobita who answers questions people have about dating Japanese people, as well as Japanese culture as it pertains to people and dating. He is very motivational, and he has greatly inspired me over the past couple of years. I lost like, thirty minutes of some sleep after we did the interview. Would people think I'm a weeaboo for going by Decchan? Would people call me ugly and question what guy would really date me for anything other than a green card? (Ouch.) Would there be a negative reaction overall? Did I say something insensitive that everyone disagrees with? However, I know it comes with the territory. There will always be people there to call black women terrible names. There will always be people who call people out at the slightest hint of their being "too" into Japanese culture. Most people w...

The Story of a Ridiculous Idea There were many feral (and stray) cats living around the University of Tsukuba, and the Ichinoya dormitories to the far north of the campus were no exception. There were informal clubs dedicated to feeding the cats, and providing them with makeshift shelters made out of storage bins to host them and their inevitable kittens. Therefore, the cats living near Ichinoya in 2013 were very fat and happy. With the exception of one. She was a scrawny, short-haired mackerel tabby. While the feral cats had their food brought to them, she did not, and resorted to meowing at the doors of the lower-level balconies until one would come out and share some rice and salmon from their onigiri . April 27, 2013, she meowed at the door of room 34-103. Her life would never be the same. Okay, moving on from the terrible prose, when I came back from Japan, I brought this cute cat with me. However, for many reasons, you can't just walk on a plane wi...

Note: The information in this post is based on my observations from when I was in Japan and what I know from the Internet, and is more included so you don't have to Google "omiyage" before reading this post to understand it, than to actually help people. Kaz was extremely helpful when I asked what I should bring his parents when I meet them this summer. "You don't have to bring them anything. You can even bring them dirt." As optimistic as he may be, I'd have to decide upon omiyage myself. Omiyage  —  お土産（おみやげ） I think of omiyage as sort of akin to "extreme souveniring". In Japan, when you go on a trip, you are expected to bring back gifts from the region to which you traveled for friends, family, and/or coworkers. These are more than keychains and magnets you hand someone as you pass them by in the office with a, "Hey, I brought you back something" (unless they love collecting fridge magnets, in which case, go for it.) Th...

A few months ago, Kaz accepted a summer internship in Tokyo, and invited me to visit him and meet his parents. Now that I know how my schedule will be, the flight and hotels have been booked for June. I've been aching to return to Japan since I left three years ago. I can't wait! ~Decchan

About a year and a half ago, I crocheted a me-doll based on  this versatile pattern by Uljana Semikrasa.  I had some male friends at the time who were interested in having a doll version of them, so a year later, I hoped Kaz would also be in this group of guys who thought a me-doll was freakin' awesome. He was. I took him to dinner later that night, and since I'd left both dolls with him earlier (he wanted to take pictures,) and he had decided it made more sense for him to have the Decchan-doll, I asked him to bring Kazzy-doll to the restaurant. He brought both of them and kept them on the table the whole time. Party of four, please. As he was packing last-minute for his trip to France, I brought up the idea of him bringing her. Like a rational human being, he was hesitant at first (he claims it was because he didn't want to lose her,) but decided to go for it. And then he does this: This guy <3 ~Decchan

Kazzy's going to France for a couple of weeks, and my mom decided we should have a combination bon voyage celebration for him, and birthday party for my aunt. Naturally, I was expected to arrange this. Including inviting people whose contact info I didn't have. I got it done 'cause I'm a ninja like that. Anyway, my last task to earn an A+ was to find some bon voyage trinkets. Which Party City has. Except when I went there, I realized they only sold the one thing I was looking for online, and in packs of 24. Which is why I came up with this care package instead. It's a good way to keep travel essentials in one place. Tuesday Morning sells all kinds and sizes of cute fancy boxes and fake books. This one is about the length of my hand, which means it's small enough to slip into a carry-on (unless you or your loved one packs like I do.) The picture with my hand is for size reference. These are some things I thought might be useful on a plane, or jus...